Melvin

So here is how i think melvin works:

so, when EA made the sporum, they made an alert button. this alert button doesn't actually do anything, well not to real people.
the alert button is like a time bomb. at first, you haven 0. once one report has happened, you add one to the timer. this gives a multiple of 1. now, the time bomb is ticking. the only thing is, it takes a VERY long time to go off. every time you report, the timer speeds up. so with two reports, you get a multiple of 2.
this is all fine, until you get to large numbers of reports. in the case of the 'melvin' as many as 1000 reports could be registered. that would speed up the timer by 1000%. that means that the time would go 1000 seconds for every 1. this means that even very long periods of time could be shortened to about half a day, or even less, depending on how many reports you do.
so, in the case of the 'melvin' with around 1000 reports, you get a timer which used to be a very long time to go very quickly. at the end of the timer, the reported thread would be deleted. this would be a defense mechanism, since 1000 reports could have been happening in 2008 when spore was so popular that loads of people were on at once.

I'm going to make an official stickied thread that will tell everyone how to Melvin. I will write this soon.